Common Questions About Attending a Funeral

Funeral Home Oahu

When attending funeral services, you might have many questions. What should I say? When do I visit? These questions and more are important to consider when comforting someone. Whether you are an immediate family member, a good friend, or a brief acquaintance, know that your presence is important in this trying time.

What Should I Say?
Be kind, and be yourself. Simply saying “I’m sorry for your loss” can be enough. Attending the funeral services of a friend’s loved one shows support in many ways, though they may not realize it until later. You can also offer a kind ear if they need to talk or wish to share a fond memory. No matter what you say, or what you offer, think about the person you’re speaking to. Be respectful in their time of need, as you would want them to be during your time.

What Should I Wear?
Tradition has always been to wear dark colors and semi-formal suits and dresses. As funeral and memorial services have changed, so too have the dictated dress guidelines. Sometimes funeral attendees will wear a memorial t-shirt or a show of support for a cause close to the deceased. Other services might be less formal, in accordance with the deceased’s and loved ones’ wishes, and ask that you wear colors based on their religious preference, or colors of the deceased’s favorite sports team, or Hawaiian-style shirts they loved. If there are specific requests, follow them as best you can, and when in doubt, wear something dark or neutral.

Should I Bring My Children?
Attending a funeral service can be stressful for anyone. Your child may ask questions to understand what’s happening and why people are upset. They may even become frightened if they see the deceased’s body. Only you have an idea of how your child will react, whether it’s with respect, misunderstanding, or fear. Keep this in mind when deciding if they should attend.

You may have many questions regarding funeral services near Oahu, HI. Valley of the Temples Memorial Park is here to answer them at (808) 239-8811. Give us a call for information about funeral planning and grief support at our cemetery.